Conversation With God !!!

"Man proposes God disposes." For a supreme soul like me dedicated solely to the uplift-ment of mankind, a few things don't come easy! I belong to the breed of engineers infesting this planet who consider few acts as a lethal sin. Today on this propitious day, in front of Lord Shiva, I am going to make the confession of the sin I did today.

Me: "O' mighty and the most puissant Lord Shiva. I come to thy gracious abode to seek forgiveness!"

God:"yes, my son first tell me who are you and what is your model number? then tell me what have you done?"

Me:"O omniscient, I am Siddharth Panigrahi, model number 4:05 am,i6th april 1990, House number 420 Sambalpur, Orissa, India."

God:"My register shows no registered any Siddharth Panigrahi in it. Were you illllllll???"

Me:"No my lord. I am a perfectly legal born son. Sorry it is 1989, the habit of bluffing people on this earth made me think i could even bluff you and postpone my death... "

God:"I am omnipresent, omnipotent and the maruti omni. Yes my register has the following entry---
Name: Siddharth Panigrahi.
Born: 16 april, 1989
Time of birth: Delivery order signed at 5:18am, earth timings may vary as per urgency
Death: One year after he loses his virginity.
Unique Qualities: Flirty, falls in love with every second girl, proposes to every third girl, gets ditched by every girl(and a die hard fan of Salma Hayek) "

(sSuddenly God shouts in havoc reckoning voice,"Parvati don't come outside. We have a very bad human here.")

God:(husked voice, with a wicked smile) "How is Salma these days?, my sources say she married a clown, and is now called Salma Pinault?' The Wi-Fi connectivity is weak here up in these Himalayas; these politicians need to be taken to task."

Me: "Lets discuss it some other day. When we have vodka and rum with us. Girls sound bad unless you are drunk".

God: "True..true...come to your confession part, you are wasting my time. Katrina has some problems with Salman going on. I have been called in the form of Allah to help.

Me: "Today, I put a disgrace to engineering breed. I took bath twice a week.(both time alone)"

God: "YOU SCOUNDREL, A**E HOLE; I send you to this earth for upliftment of mankind. Save water and teach the world the importance of water, and what have you done today you took a bath. You scum bag, you don't deserve to be here. I am going to make sure you don't live another second. I am going to open my third eye now!!!"

Me: Forgive me my lord, my saviour, forgive me. Nini and Bui keep taunting me everyday, so in a hesitant offer to make things rite, i commited this hideous crime my lord. I come in front of you to beg for mercy, my almighty. Forgive me, i will never commit such crimes ever !!!

God: " Ja Vats, i forgive you, if they where the ones who inspired you to do it. I permit you to bathe daily. Use a soap if you can child, will you. You stink !!"
"Oh my sweet lord, since how many days its been you havnt had a bath, you insolent rat ?"

Me: " its been a year my lord".

God:" Oh god get the hell out of my site, and do obey to what ever they say, they are god kids, i took my time my made them with much thought and feelings".

Me:" As you say my lord".

HAPPY BATHING !!!